Unction 6

 

Seun loosed her hair from the knot while her hair stylist Danjuma (who she called Danji) found a towel and placed around her shoulders. Getting her hair and nails done was therapeutic for her and she had used the same salon for over 10 years. She loved its ambience and the classical music the owner projected from the speakers. The stylists were neat and courteous besides being skillful so she didn’t mind driving a bit of a distance when they moved further away.

Nkem often teased her for paying so much attention to her hair and nails but wearing little or no makeup. Her thick natural hair needed a bit of help for her to appear well-groomed as she did not have the inclination to style it herself but she never felt pretty wearing makeup.

“It’s either they over-arch my brows or use a lip colour that makes my lips look bigger or they put blush on my cheeks”, she had replied Nkem. “I don’t know when dark women started blushing visibly.”

Nkem had laughed. “Just tell them their limits and they will stick to it,” she said, referring to the makeup artists.

“Will they listen? Talmabout ‘Let me just enhance it for you’. Next thing, a masquerade is in the mirror staring back at you.”

Danji interrupted her reverie. “Do you want to braid your hair?”

“No. The same style as last week is fine.”

“Okay.”

As he began to work on her hair, she felt the urge to pray so she closed her eyes and began to pray under her breath. Danji was humming a tune so he couldn’t hear her. There were 2 other customers in the salon. One of them was a middle-aged woman, carrying on a conversation on her phone while someone did her pedicure. Seun observed her closely and saw that the conversation was getting heated and had degenerated into an argument.

“What an irony! An argument shows up to take away from the most relaxing time stamp on earth. Gosh!” she thought.

She attempted to ignore the raised voice but it was becoming more and more difficult. Probably out of respect for her age, no one wanted to tell the customer she was causing a disturbance. Danji bent and whispered an apology into her ear but she motioned for him not to worry. Minutes later, the woman ended the call and apologized to the room. Echoes of “It’s okay ma” filled the room. She rose from the pedicure table and took a seat beside Seun to get her hair woven into the hairstyle called ‘didi’. It was popular among women who wanted to wear a wig and needed to have their hair tamed underneath.

“Good afternoon ma”, Seun greeted her.

“God bless you my daughter. I hope I did not disturb you?”

“No ma.”

“I’m very sorry. These boys want to kill me! My shop where I sell wholesale diapers, wipes and baby food is where I assigned a new manager. Now I hear he is diverting my goods and stealing my money.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that!”

“The worst is that he is the son of my daughter-in-law’s cousin. He is a graduate who has been searching for work for 5 years. I said ‘let me help his destiny’. Shei destiny-helper has not turned to victim of armed robbery loun loun?”

“Pele…”

“Wo…I just want him to return the money. If not, SARS is what I will use to deal with him. It’s like they don’t know me.”

Seun made a clucking sound, in sympathy. She was experienced in handling women of this age, her mom being enough of a tutorial all by herself. They didn’t expect you to solve their problem. All they needed was your listening ear, a few nods and sighs to show you were as horrified by the injustice done to them as they were.

The woman’s phone buzzed. She answered and could be heard giving someone directions to find the salon in the 2-storey plaza that housed it. Not long after, a young man in his early twenties showed up dressed in raggedy jeans and a white T-shirt on which was written ‘Madam Fancy Baby Shop’. He prostrated in greeting and stretched a hand to receive the money she was holding out.

“Go with the bus and handle all the supplies for today. I will take an uber home. I don’t want that thief to supervise supplies till he returns all my money. Ole…Oloriburuku!”

“You set up an innocent man to get money to pay for your girlfriend’s migration to Canada?”

Every eye in the room turned in Seun’s direction.

“Eh?” The young man paled.

“I saw you before you climbed the stairs. You are the one stealing Mama’s money. Why did you set up an innocent man?”

“What are you saying? Ganiyu has been with me for 7 years. He is not a thief.” The woman was puzzled at Seun’s boldness.

“Collect his phone and check his account balance.”

Ganiyu knelt down, raising a hand to lick a finger and point it at the sky. “Mama Fancy, if I have ever stolen one naira from you, let my mother die.”

“Your mother? I thought you collected money from me to bury your mother last year,” Mama Fancy asked, incredulous.

“That one na my step-mother. Na she train me when I dey small because my mama run leave my papa.”

“Ganiyu! Your story is not adding up. You collected money from me to pay rent for your parents not long ago because you said your mother called to ask for help.”

“Collect his phone and check his balance.”

“Mama Fancy, I swear, I no fit do you bad thing…”

“Bring your phone, guy. Wetin dey do you?” Danji had lent a voice.

The other staff crowded the scene, insisting on him handing over his phone. Finally, the manicurist jerked the boy up by his pants and extracted the phone from his pocket. He passed it to Mama Fancy who opened to his texts. There was a hush as everyone waited with bated breath. Ganiyu was still protesting his innocence when Mama Fancy yelled, “Kini eleyi?”

She passed the phone to Danji who turned the screen so Seun could see it as well.

“How did you manage to have N2m in your account? The last credit alert alone is for N800k and it is from the account of one of our customers.” She rose and grabbed him by the collar in a chokehold. “Do I look like your mate?”

“Kai! This boy na bad boy”, Danji remarked.

“See him face like bad dream”, the braider added.

“Why all these boys dey like to fall hand?” asked the manicurist.

“Ganiyu when I finish with you today, your ancestors will come and beg me! I will end your lineage. You don’t know me. Emi ke? Ah…”

“Please Mama Fancy, take it easy”, someone appealed.

“Let him transfer all the money back to you 1^st”, Seun suggested.

“My darling, I haven’t even thanked you. I don’t know how you found out that this boy has been robbing me but God will bless you for me. Oya, wey your phone? Tranfer the money now now!”

His phone was handed back to him. “Mama, I no be thief. Andrew say make I keep money for am. You know say I no go school. I no sabi say na the money wey him thief be dat. I swear!”

“Shataaaap! Which Andrew? That innocent boy wey don dey beg since yesterday? You are a liar! Transfer my money now!”

“That is how someone would have been detained and tortured over a false accusation”, the braider commented.

“SARS for that matter! You don enter their cell before?” the manicurist asked.

‘I hear say you fit agree say na you kill Abacha make them release you,” Danji replied.

“Them don catch me for where we go drink say we dey loiter. The kind beating wey dem beat me, this ear still dey make whiun whiun whiun any time wey 10 O’clock nack.”

“Why 10 O’clock?”

“Na the time wey the beating take start na! E be like say the ear dey remember the slaps, dey rehearse am again. I don treat am tire. Persin even say make I piss for cup pour inside ear but e no work.”

“Piss?”

“My brother, wetin man never see.”

 

******************************************************************************

 

Kindly like, leave a comment and share.

Cheers,

Dr.N